I discarded a lot of ideas for what I wanted to write about in this first blog. The truth is I'm still rather conflicted about writing here at all. I don't want to sound preachy or out of touch with how the world actually works. So for the record, though I dislike talking about myself, I should make it clear that I am fully aware of how much the world and all of it's inhabitants can suck. That many people can and do choose to be flat out evil. I just refuse to give up to the "it's all bad and there's nothing I can do about it" mentality that I see many people use as an excuse to not try. And if you are one of those people, please don't send me long ranting e-mails about how wrong I am. I don't care. And I am far more stubborn than you can imagine. Now, on to other things.
I have been listening to various people this month describe their holiday celebrations and what they "mean" to them. Some of them even get quite heated about their celebration being the only "true" reason for the holiday. And it occured to me that they have forgotten the most important reason we come together. Love. Love is why we put up with overbearing parents who ask why we don't yet have a spouse/baby/promotion. Why we kill ourselves cooking up the perfect meal we know will be consumed and forgotten within hours. Why we invite that friend/relative of our spouses we really can't stand but they think is wonderful.
But we don't want to talk about love on anything more than a superficial level. We don't really even want to feel it unless we are absolutely sure it's safe. Oh, we say we do. Claim it's the one thing we must have. And then we run screaming in the other direction when confronted with the possibility that we may not be loved in return. And that fear prompts us to fill that hole with anything else we can find that we can pretend shows us love.
It's all very...dysfunctional of us. But is it really necessary? Why can't we just admit to our feelings? Be willing to risk rejection? Could it really be any worse than the messes we twist ourselves into now? And just imagine how much of a difference it would make in our lives. Perhaps that's what we truly fear, not that things would be worse, but that things could be so much better than they are now, and we are just still going along with the status quo.
Could you try it? Try just telling someone you love them, want to spend time with them? Not because it's Christmas, or you happen to be related, but because their presence in your life brings you joy. Make your time together a real holy day.
People are apathetic and oblivious, for the most part, to much of what you have stated. Case in point, the rapidity in which the spirit of the Holidays diminish at their conclusion, and we return to our normal ways.
ReplyDeleteIt hit me a few weeks ago that many of the ideals I hold - the sense of revolution, bringing power back to the people and replicating the sense of passion and commitment that we have seen in places like Iran, the Communists in South America, etc. - will never come to fruition in North America. In both Canada there are a plethora of issues which should incite people to demand change - health care, corporate bailouts, war, education, the environment etc. - but, aside from a bit of whimpering and the odd letter to the Editor, most people grumble and muddle on. It's sad, and, perhaps I am cynical. Ultimately, though I continue in the spirit of Sisyphus, I feel like my dreams for a better world will never see the light of day.